Healing the People-Pleaser Wound

A Somatic Guide to the Fawn Response, Nervous System Regulation, and the Return to the Authentic Self

People pleasing is not your personality, your character defect, or your lack of self-esteem. It is a survival response — the precise behavioral output of a nervous system that learned, in the first years of life, that accommodation was the price of belonging. A clinically rigorous and emotionally precise account of the fawn response. Not a book about boundaries: a somatic roadmap for changing what your nervous system believes is dangerous. Drawing on the research of Pete Walker, Bessel van der Kolk, Gabor Maté, and Allan Schore.

by Nikita Datar

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